I Am the Devil Notes
I love this type of story. I read the summary, and immediately went off to read the first chapter. I always thought it was both a tragedy and a blessing that there aren't more stories like this. A tragedy since that means I'm strapped to find stuff with a similar plot, and a blessing since it hasn't been completely butchered.
Onto the actual reviews now!
It seems like a mature version of the Grim Adventures of Bill and Mandy. Nataly and Danny, from what I've read, seem like genuine friends. Especially the comment about the yellow convertible.
Good cliffhanger with the dead girl and the pentagram. I thought it was really well executed the way Danny revealed that it was a pentagram. All in all, I'm definitely reading the other chapters, but a few critiques. Show, don't tell. There isn't much description of anything. That isn't to say that it's not allowed (Well, Chuck Palahniuk proved that it's allowed), but there are certain things I'd like to have read about in more detail. For example, the introduction of Chris and Katie. Maybe some description of how Katie has so much makeup on her face, it's a miracle she isn't dragging her head around on the ground.
Or how Chris has his shirt inside out. Something to add some more... depth to what's happening. Just my two cents.
Good cliffhanger again. Although, it was actually infuriating for me since I realized that there wasn't a Chapter 3 yet. I like how Satan sent Danny an email. I guess even devils have to go along with the modern days. Gone are the days when they'd be summoned by a pentagram and some Latin with a dash of sulfur.
Danny and Nataly seem rather cold. Well, let me rephrase. They don't seem to feel much of anything. They're very muted about everything, and thus, the impact of these events doesn't really hit home as hard as they should.
Granted, it's probably intentional. Teenagers, after all, are reputed to be quiet and introspective (Although, as a teenager myself, I'm more talkative than quiet...). I hope that in future chapters, though, they show more fear. (I sound like such a sadist right now.)
Anyways, looking forward to Chapter 3. Hook me up with it before all the others, and I'll give you a thousand bucks in Monopoly money.
I wonder what next will happen. Oh, well, guess I'll have to wait till tomorrow. Hope these comments help.